I admitt, thats first step!

ah well


Am admitting.
I got a problem.

Thats first step right?

Am an apartment looking junkie.

I cant get enough!

Saw nr 61 today, since last thursday.
Its so bloody hard, if one can pick something from each, and the best one is in Sliema, where i dont wanna live

ohh my.... you think it helps getting wasted? I mean maybe i will have some outside body vision extraterestial life experience.... its worth a try right?

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Why go out if your not ready to F*ck ?

Easter 2009

Yes now its over, thank god! Not that i dont like yellow and fethers and egg and chickens, its allright, its just so weird we need a lot of hollidays i mean, i work everyday anyway, only differences these hollidays do to my poor soul is more alkohol.

Am just home now, started out to be THE most boring eveing in PV ever, i couldnt even manage to steam some hooligans up for kick boxing telling them how much i dear and deepley hated ManU, when not even THAT work, then one know its hard. BUT then something weird happened...and it started already saturday....:

I had a kind of weird conversations saturday at Native.
And its weird, because this started out to be somone i really didnt like, but he was very stubborn and in end it turned out to be someone i KNEW, small world!

Him: you want a drink?
Me: No, thx.
Him: come one, pls just one.
Me: no am ok, thx.

I continue rocking things with my girls.

Him: So whats your name?

I try my best to ignore, its hard, he is very stubborn, you know its the wolf houer, where everyone who havent got lucky are desperate and just step up a noch or two to sort it.

Him: whats your name?
Me: its Ester
Him: Esh? what?

lol

Me: Ester as in easter.
Him: ok whatever, you live alone?

I dont answer that one, none of his buisness cos he NEVER going to see my place anyway. (even though he actually looked allright, selfsure and hooligan kind of type, didnt smell of puke and seemed to be in legal age so lots of important boxes ticked but nope)

I gotta give it to him either he is very depserate or he is just determend to win this one...anyway...

Him: Easter Girl, come one.
Me: what?
Him: we both know this is bullshit talking, lets just go home, am tired
( actually this CAN work on me, i kind of like a man that is straight forward, but if am not interested its going to be a world war 3 before he gets lucky)
Me: Good luck.

Him: nooo dont be like that, why you go out then?
Me: am gay, am here with my girls

Here he seem to think a bit, like taking the information in, and well am not gay but i think you know that. However he kind of decided that this information was not of that big importance for his mission so he keep on:

Him: no fu*king way you are, then God is a fu*king mental case (english people swear a lot, i think)
Me: no he just had a ruff day making me, couldnt make his mind up.
Him: but they dont dance like that, i been watching. And they dont really have sparkling eyes. (ehhh woot? is he joking with me? noone says these things, seriously noone....its year 2009)

Me: give up, its not going to happen.
Him: bitch.
Me: Excuse me?
Him: bitch
Me: soooo just cos i dont want to do YOU a complete stranger am a bitch?
Him: yes. WHY go out then if your not ready to fu*k?
Me: ehhhhhh, what a idiotic thing to say
Him; bitch.

He is kind of starting to make me angry now, i know i should just ignore and walk away, but for some reason i cant and we end up argueing, angry, loud and silly, so phatetic, i throw my drink on his face tell him to **** off and left. But that was good, the girls and i moved on to shadows where i run into the CL boys, nice but i didnt stay very long, we do a better party like a rock star next

THEN tonight, after trying to whine those Man U fans up i turn around and who is there if not that annoying person, seriously NOT funny. Just my luck.

Him: ohh angry green eye girl with funny name ( he was aparantley not THAT drunk as i thought, if one can remember someones eye colour one arnt)
Me: you deserved it
Him: so they say all the time
Me: good
Him: you want a drink?

lol

Me: ohhh no, here we go again. NO THANKS!
Him: no no i never try to get you home ever again, i swear but cant we just have a drink?
Me: but why? As am not ready to do what you want this is quite time wasting right?
Him: no am curious, girls are normaly not like this
Me: am not really a girl, i think woman is more accurat
Him: i think your weird and funny
Me: i think your stupid, and that shirt is ugly and you should shave better
Him : i know, i dont like it either, but noone ever told me its ugly. Is it really UGLY? And if i know i meet you again i shave
Me: ok good for you, i dont really care.
Him: of course you do, you want me.
Me: no i dont
Him: your funny. Lets go, i get a taxi.
Me: so you still think you can make it?
Him: yes
Me: Your waisting your time, if you wanna get laid, go harress someone else

But now i actually starting to think he is a bit funny, but i cant really give up my mascho no no attitude now allright, thats weak.


Him: i have no problem getting laid. But they are just pretty little girls without cloths, not what i need
Me: well if you want to find wife material this is not the best place.
Him: can you do scrambled egg or omelett? I prefer that in morning. And bacon.
Me: of course i can, but i wont.
Him: come on, please?
Me: will you leave me alone if i have one drink.
Him: if i say yes i lie and thats not a good way starting something.
Me: lol
Him: only poker players actually SAYS l.o.l
Me: ok well am damaged then.
Him : so what, so you play online?


He IS little funny, so yeaaaaaa i agree to a drink, i mean what harm can one drink do!!!

Now... am not good in having one drink so we have quite a few and actually having fun, he is from London here on buiness combined with some days vaccation and seem to be quite ok actually, imean with brain, not as i first thought, plain idiot.

THEN ...Its so so weird. it turns out we played eachother so so many times both on Boss and on cryptologic where i played a lot 1-2 years ago, he tells me his nick and i reqocnise it straight, i tell him if he ever remember playing ********* ( i dont wanna put my nick out, sorry) He remembers, both that nick and 2 other nicks, so so sick. Even remember what i used to say to him around the tables, hahaha i can be quite rude sorry. World is really small.

Or maybe its just Malta being small.

Sooo.. what started out with me throwing a drink in his face, yea sorry am a bit impulsive i know, ended up quite ok anyway. He be playing EPT San Remo next week and as i might go over anyway we decided he can treat another drink.... or two.

He walked me to Wembleys, sorted a taxi out for me, opened the door lol
(WHO does that? ITS year 2009 .. still...)

Him: sleep well green eye big bump girl
Me: thx retard with ugly shirt

We kind of sliped into the online talking, like around tables, it dont mean anything to me said like that, just funny, but the taxi driver looked a bit suprised, but its Malta i guess they heard and seen it all.

Him: if you want me to join you just say it, but you have to SAY it.
Me: i will never say it
Him: so then it will never happen
Me: no, unless you give me many drinks, then it might
Him: ok thx for the advice
Me: your welcome.

And now am home, so silly this evening turned out, but as the very nice chicka bella i am i decided to fix him some breakfast

I know his name and i assumed he stayed either on Hilton or Continental as he didnt needed a taxi and i know the stakes he play, so it gotta be one of those two. So i phoned the recepitions, found him, i can be very stubborn so they told me, and then i order breakfast for him to his room 08 a clock, scrambled egg and bacon. They charge my card. It was not cheap, and if he dont get its me, he is daft and dont deserve it anyway.

Am silly

and tomoprrow when sobering up i probarbly most likley erase this blog


night

Getting even! Fair and square!

Its been one of those crazy weeks, and as always when being somewhere i make imposible schedules, and run around fitting all in. But i like stress, organized chasos makes me happy. Proparbly cos i feel important solving it :)

I love the kind of job i have, am very blessed, i work with something that interests me and also sort of my hobby. Thats very fortuned. I know.
And am greatful - for sure.

Friday was set aside to travel to the town where i lived several years, and when moving to copenhagen june last year i stored all my life (lol) and stuff into my storage room belonging to the apartment, i rented the place out to a sweet little girl with big brown eyes and said: hasta las vista baby!

When moving to Malta in november i let her have the contract of the apartment, i got no plan ever in this lifetime live in that city again. My ex live there still.

Seperation was like 100 yers ago so its ok, imean WTF it happens, people move on and life is there to live, and i have not said a bad word about him, even though i surley could allright, and my friends and family where swearing over him, i just think liek this: we had some awsome years aswell, so if i start to talk bad about it, then those years get dirty too, and i dont want that. Things happen for a reason. And i leared so so much going trough it, and its up to each and everyone to create ones happiness, cant expect on others to do that for you and remember: Happiness isnt a place its a journey! Fuck am such sentimental bitch! Grow up!

HE anyway, lived in this apartment with me for 4 years and he hasent even put one hr in helping me emptying it down to the seller so now he just had to, and actually we last 6-7 months been on speakable terms even had fun and joking, so all good, i thought!. This town is 2 hrs with train from copenhagen so up early. finaly there and rented car, trailer to move all this shit to a leased storage room where noone can tell me with 2 days notice move your stuff, wich the pretty brown eyed girl did a weeka go.

Ex came, he said hi, moved 5 boxes and left. lol. Yepps! (puke)

Now it all came very clear to me again, THANK GOD, as he plan to come to Malta and visit me, now i really can say NO, why we are not WE anymore! Besides all lies and betrayls, he is still a selfish, lazy bastard. Why he had to leave?
Someone dying? Emergency? Nooooooo: TRAINING!!

Arghhh.. serioulsy, i live in Malta, i come home, i got ONE day to do this! I know, he is an elite athlete and need to train 3 times a day, I KNOW, our whole life was about that. But COME ON!!! I really dont like lazy people, and he is lazy with everything exept his training, i dont expect people to work 18 hrs a day as i do but arghhhh.. i dont often ask for help, this time i did. So am left there its even lots of furnish i cant move it my self, impossible. But i sorted it. Out of pure anger.

A girl in the house that i know since long came by seeing me, and i said hey dont you need anything (lol) she asked me if i joke. I said nope, take whatever you want need i cant care less. So she took a whole serie of bookshelfs with glasdoors and about 1000 books , i had a whole big wall with books. I also had about 200 books from late 1800 in leather that i been running around in old shops finding one now and one then so i got a whole serie, i had it valued some yers back and it was worth so much so i even upgraded my home incurence, so i gave her thoose too.

I said: listen, Am in love with these books, i been collecting them in small shops all over sweden for several years every town i come to i look in small antique shops, they mean something to me, they are so so beautiful peaces please dont burn them, take them and sell them and travel, and please have a shitload of drinks (lol) and send me a post card.

She promsied she will send me a postcard, so thats nice, thanks! (puke)

Whe done, Its an understatment to say i was totaly exhousted and pain in muscels i didnt even know i had, or can fat also have pain?

Ex texted and called 12 times wanting to know i was ok and sorry sorry sorry sorry, i of course didnt pick up just deleted his fu**ing messages! Word dont count, what you do counts! HE of all people know i cant do these things, some days i cant even open a bottle myself, thats what arthorithis does to you. And he knows.
Well, bye bye Mr super mega elite 3 times Olympic Games participation MASTER.
Your erased! You proofed your self once again. (puke)

Soo.. around 16:20 the travelcompany decided to bless my wonderful day with a phonecall informing me the flight i booked to get home to Malta has been canceled.

I never heard that, delayed but totaly cancelled and 24 hrs ahead? Well, not my problem i told them, just sort it. She says no we have right to do this 24 hrs before take off. And she actually did call 24 hrs and 10 minutes before take off NH GG WP, i gave her a very sincer compliment knowing the company rules so so well and told her that it really must makes her feel superior (puke) then i hang up.

Cant be bothered, i fly home another day then FFS!
She phoned back in 10 min and had fixed it, but next problem is, they cant take swedish or malta card, so the flight was paid by a colleque in denmark earlier that morning, just to be able to get the ticket. I have a danish card as well, but no money on it since i dont use it . And now she really chocked me, (concidering how rude i was earlier to her, but i was really feed up on this day so she got for it) she said: no its ok, give us a ring next week and you can pay the difference then. -, what? Weird. Because its not a compnay we use all time for travel its just one of those online companies.

So finaly in my hotel in copenhagen, longing for a hot long bath and a glas of wine. I beliave i deserved it. I turn on the water and go and check my emails i only had over 100 being away a day, sick. Then i get lost in some conversation, and suddley i noticed it sounds weird from the bathroom and FUCK yes my bath! Arghhh...

And this room is a suite, as we had meetings we needed space. I dunno how to explain but the bathroom has a step down about 15 cm ....... and yepps.. water all the ways up to the step! And HOW can one build a bathroom with out any place for water to get away?? There isnt any!!! My god. So dressed only in a bathrobe am trying to get my way to the bath tube to atleast close the tap. Yea sure.

Why i think this would be ok i dont know, nothing else this day been ok. I slip. Hit my head, manage to not fall but it costed me a trip into the zink, so i got noseblood. This is not funny Martin, stop laughing! Yes iknow you! your laughing now!

I start my swearing,am really good at that, took same one as i have in store when my AA get cracked, its not nice, i can assure you all that. I find some ice for my forehead and then while in middle of all this, it knocks on my door. And i know who it is and what he want, and if i dont open he just go in! He done that for 2 days now. Its the water man. Yepps .. seeeeee people living in suits get lot of important revolving life changing bennefits, one of them are the water man.

Every day 20.30 ish, he comes around to give you an extra bottle of water (HOW silly is that, if i badly want a bottle of water and the minibar dont have water i drink something else OR CALL room service or?) i just dont get this.
And he knock again. ARghhh..

So i stumble out, nosebleeding and the white bathrobe looking like i killed someone, bloody and all wet and holding a towel with some ice on my head. To be honest, am not in my most frindley mood. Actually, in all fairness am quite irritated. And am still swearing. Very foul words. I open the door, and i have to give him some credit actually, he didnt even blinc, (lol) he just said in that very special english accent people from India got:

-god evening madam, your water is here.
(here, HERE, like i was sitting waiting for it, jesus christ)
I said: THANKS!!!


I dont need more water, i got the whole freaking bathroom full!

I somehow got to remove the water from the bathroom it cant be like this, but how? Am not going to crawl around here on my knees after a day like this with a coffe cup pouring it into the zink!

I take as much as i can away. Used all towels there where, even those extra ones in wardrobe. And then i crack the genious idea ( sometimes am suprised myself how smart i am) to use the floor heating, the bathroom got floor heating, of course, people living in suits cant be expected to step their precious feets on cold floors while stumbling out there in the morning so, great! I turn it up on full speed, take my shower, go ut, close the door and say night night bathroom.

Then i jumped into bed with Mr Laptop a very faithful and trustworthy partner, had a few glases of wine, played few tables of poker, did some amazing sick suck outs that made me fel so so soooooooooooo great, and told them : Ty most appreciated. They hate that.

I woke up saturday morning with lap in my arms (lol) i really love him so so much.

So left to say about this trip is just: am prepearing for next one Mr Jinx Master so you gotta be very good next time, cos am getting even, fair and square.

cheers!

/panna

NB: sickest thing is - there is probably not one thing in that storage room i would ever miss or want again, exept those books. Carpe Diem!

Playboy mansion - i got a question

Well….. This has absolutely nothing to do with poker :-)\ but am a bit puzzled!

This program Playboy Mansion, where the camera follow these three stunning beautiful girls on their hard days (lol) at the Hugh Heffner Mr Playboy Mansion.
Am really confused.

Well... I took early night yesterday was tempted to go to casino and do their 20 euro rebuy, thats how bored i was even, but ended up bed to watch TV and got stucked in this program to start with.

BTW, does people in Malta don’t have TV in their bedroom?
The guy installing the cable connection in my bedroom back in November was very doubtful to it, he asked me 3 times
– Madam, (WTF lay of this madam shit now) you want TV in bedroom as well as living room?

He was very veeeery cute and was some sort of deep sea or if it was skydiver, lived up in north, had a Swedish friend visiting day after to do diving (why do people tell me all sort of things?? Happens all the time, I did NOT ask)
Ahh well as he being so cute I figure he deserves an answer else I simply ignore those questions, as in all fairness it’s not his business. But I told him, yes I need TV bedroom I watch a lot of movies late at night. AND then I stir him straight in his sweet little innocent eyes with a slight of tinkle in corner of left eye (lol so funny to see his reaction)
He said: oh.. and BLUSHED!!! Hahaha he thought I watch adult movies,,, well I got the big Cable packet and so far have not been able to stumble over something even close to that so not likely. But then he actually regain senses pretty quick, he gotta have credit for that, and said: well then Madam ( arghhhhhhhh,, pls) I better get to work then, and he blinked!! Haha… I said
- yepps get right on it!

We actually ended up drinking coffee after he was done so I don’t believe I scared him too much. Even though am pretty sure he tells his work mates, there is a nuts MADAM (this gotta stop, I hate being called madam) living on nr 32. Pretty standard, heard the nuts part before, it’s ok, I don’t care, not much anyway :P

OK, back to Mr Hugh Heffner and the blondies without brains, am not sure why I started to watch this crap but when living in Copenhagen it was on so many channels so one couldn’t avoid it and TV is always on when grinding the tables so for some reason I got stuck in it. But am really reaaaaally confused. Honestley.

First of all WHAT is it with this old man walking around in a bathrobe all days????
-WHY CANT HE GET DRESSED?

Second of all, how does it WORKS, I mean, they are all his girlfriends, right?
And one of them Holly is like first lady of the house. I get that part.
Hmmm well.. Do they all **** him?
Sorry but I don’t get that part?

And do they take turns sleeping his bed then or, I mean the bed is huge sometimes they lay there all 4 watching a movie ordering room service but:
-is it the first lady who sleeps there at night?
And if he wants to attend the other two, does she leave then or does he visit their rooms?

Well, every time I see this program in the background I wonder these things *shaking my head*

But what is it with this man in this bathrobe?

Anyone get it?